i can't help but to be really dependent on some ppl.it just looks like when i lose em,i lose everything.shldn't i be depending on myself and God ? and of all ppl,why do i choose smone tt makes me feel so insecure of wad;s gonna happen the next day or the day aft ? why make myself depend so much on tt one person..when im not even sure if we'll last and still be the pair i think we are , a week later? isn't life sometimes - a really big joke ? u want to and insist on doing smthing.but u later find out tt u can't bring urself to do tt certain smthing.

i want to . i really want to . but yet..i still don't want. -see the whole irony of it ?-

we all go into school,work or play with a certain expectation frm the ppl we engage our lives in daily.we try hard to make the whole thing go our way.and when smthing cocks up .. , who do we blame? do we blame ourselves for expecting too much ? or do we blame the ppl for not meeting our expectations ?


maybe its just a two way thing.we give and take.
or
mayber its just the way God planned life ...
interesting yet complicated.

nite.